Joose (jooseboxx) wrote,
Joose
jooseboxx

GLEE: What Am I Waiting For

Title: What Am I Waiting For [part two]
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: Not mine. No money. No affiliation.



One of the biggest complications comes just after school stops. Burt and Carole are both at work, Kurt has a planned afternoon to help out at the garage and Finn had to run out to the store for the stuff Carole asked him to pick up the day before that he forgot about. It was only meant to take twenty minutes, but Finn was gone for over an hour before the front door opened. Puck wasn't too concerned, sat out on the sofa like he was with the television on some mindless show and practically swaddled in blankets.

"Dude, what happened? You forget why you were out?" But when he turns his head, it's not Finn standing there with groceries he wasn't meant to get. It's Blaine (even though this is the first time Puck's seen Blaine without his blazer and honestly, it looks like the curly haired hobbit is out in disguise or something). "Um, Kurt's at the garage, you'll get him there until like five I think." What's weird is that Blaine just walked in, Blaine is like super polite and all that crap that Burt seems to like or whatever, so it's a little off that he didn't ring the doorbell or something.

"I know, I was there." Okay, so why was he here? Puck didn't bother asking it, just raising his eyebrow in question instead. "Finn's been held up on whatever errand he was running. He text Kurt to see if he could check in on you."

"And Kurt sent you?" Puck got that Kurt was still a little pissed off at Puck's whole new age way of raising a kid (rather than the traditional method of being miserable in your life) and was probably looking at ways to show Puck this. Sending his new little boy-thing to sit with Puck while Finn was out might top that list of 'ways to really irritate and annoy Puck'.

"Not really, no." Blaine moved to sit on the table beside Puck's seat on the couch, his curly little head right in front of the screen. Puck recognised this from Sarah's attention getting methods. "He didn't get the text message, he was busy, so I thought I'd stop by." Okay, creepy little Warbler is seriously not needed and Puck's getting the impression that Blaine has something he'd like to say.

"Okay, you have five minutes to get whatever is on your chest, off it. Then I'm kicking you out. Pregnant or not, I don't care, I will toss your ass on the street." He doesn't intend on playing nice, since Blaine pretty much invited himself over to talk at Puck if he's reading this right, so it's not as if he needs to be polite or anything. He's pregnant and hormonal, that shit is like a get out of jail free card or whatever.

"I'm getting the impression that you don't like me." Puck wonders where that impression came from; possibly the fact that Puck's not all that keen on Blaine? "At first I thought maybe it was just because Kurt transferred to Dalton, but he said you two weren't really friends, so I thought maybe it could be something else. But Kurt's back at McKinley and you're still a tad hostile and I couldn't figure out why until Kurt called a few weeks ago and pretty much blurted out everything." So Kurt had at least told Blaine that Puck's daughter was Kurt's baby. It's oddly satisfying to know that it's not some huge big secret that Kurt genuinely doesn't want people to know about.

"So? I'm hormonal; I don't like a lot of people. On good days I only mildly dislike most people." Since just about everything annoys the hell out of him, Puck's even finding it hard to be around Britt and Artie most days (they are sickeningly sweet in their whole reconciliation thing and Puck wants to stab them in the face with blunt kitchen utensils more than a third of the time).

"Look, I get that you might be upset that I stole your boyfriend,"

"Woah there munchkin," Blaine went from 'not even friends' to 'boyfriends' in one big leap there, didn't he. "Kurt and I weren't dating. There was no relationship, there were no dates, there was no big announcement. It was sex, pure and simple. He said so himself, we aren't even friends." Puck's pretty sure it's going to take a lot to get this through to people. Kurt did not want him and thus there is and was no them. Finn and Santana were bad enough, now Blaine and eventually there would be Rachel and Mercedes. Puck was going to need to strangle a lot of people.

"Right, okay. But now there's going to be a baby, and that's a big thing. I just don't want you punishing Kurt because you feel like you lost him to me."

"I never had Kurt to lose." Kurt clearly didn't think enough about their...whatever, to even call them friends. Which was weird, because Puck was pretty sure, before they got to the whole sex thing, they were becoming friends. "And I'm not doing anything. He can see her as much as he wants to, it's not like I'm saying no."

"I'm glad that's how you feel." Blaine stands up, smiling his stupid little smile that isn't all smug and shit, it's just this annoyingly genuine smile. "Because I hope to be a part in Kurt's life for a long time to come." Puck just raised an eyebrow at Blaine before the Warbler nodded once and left. So apparently Blaine wanted to be around Kurt which meant being around their kid which meant that the littlest Puckerman was going to have like three Daddies. Puck just hit himself in the face with the nearest pillow.

This shit was muffed up.

#

He's under an umbrella in Rachel's back yard, the rest of glee (and Blaine who is like their unofficial mascot or something) hanging out around the pool while he stays out of the sun as per Mr Berry (the short one) and his instructions (seriously, there had been a list). It's one of those days where he wished they'd just let him chill out at home or leave him in the house. Santana wouldn't hear any of it though and he was dragged out to Rachel's in a pair of board shorts and a muscle shirt that was three sizes bigger than his usual pulled over his stomach and then left in a lounger by the pool with a cold drink (Rachel's special made just for him green tea concoction that he actually rather liked) and a parasol to protect him from the sun.

He'd have been just as well inside.

They have two more weeks of summer, Puck is officially as big as a house and cannot actually get himself out of a chair on his own (Quinn likes to point out that she didn't get that big at all, which causes Tina to elbow her and shake her head because apparently they're worried about him with the whole it was twins thing) and he wants the whole pregnancy part to be done already. He kind of gets mostly ignored, except when someone is going inside the house to get a refill on their drink or some snacks, and then Puck gets a fresh drink and some crackers because Rachel has a cupboard filled with stuff for him. She also has a cupboard with baby formula and shit, but he's not mentioning that.

It happens just a little suddenly, like a cramp in his side from running too much or something; except he's not been running anywhere for ages. It stops as quickly as it comes on, so he sort of dismisses it, until it happens again five minutes later or so. It's seriously annoying, and just a little painful in that sharp, stinging kind of way. When the second one stops, he pulls himself up, swinging his legs over the side of the lounger to lean forward. The third one comes a little sooner than the last and he's smacked in the face with the realisation that these might be those contraction things that Quinn had. Of course her water broke first, but it wasn't like he had anywhere for that to go, and holy shit he was having his baby.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck." He wasn't prepared for this, there was no way he'd manage it. Oh crap he was actually going to have a baby.

"Puck, sweetie, you okay?" Mercedes is with the others in the pool, Finn and Santana went to get refills ten minutes ago and are probably making out in Rachel's kitchen right then, and now he had everyone's attention (bar the indisposed couple).

"No." He had to grit his teeth through another of the pains, and yeah, that was definitely a contraction. "Pretty sure I'm in labour." The splashing of activity is all that tells him the others are getting their shit together, because he's too busy glaring at the decking in front of him to look over. Sam and Mike are the ones getting him to a car, Rachel is the one grabbing all their stuff and Finn and Santana are calling around the families to make sure everyone knows. Kurt is the one driving him to the hospital.

"Just do the breathing thing, like they do on the television." Kurt's the one doing the breathing and Puck just grinds his teeth with each contraction, hoping to hell they give him some morphine or something soon. "We're almost there, keep breathing, just in and out and in and out and-"

"Kurt, please just shut up and drive." Labour hurts. Why the hell do chicks go through all this? The morning sickness and the sore back and the sore feet and the cravings and the stupid sleep cycles and the kicks and the mood swings and the hormones and the contractions, holy crap this shit is insane. He's comforted at least by the fact that he won't be pushing a melon out from between his legs thank fuck.

When they arrive at the hospital, Puck is herded inside by a still panicking Kurt who tries to tell the nurse at reception that Puck is having a baby, but it comes out in French and both Puck and the nurse just stare for a minute before Puck manages to tell the woman that he's having contractions about three minutes apart and he'd like that epidural they told him about thanks. It's all a whirlwind of activity until he's in a private room with Kurt, the rest of the club nowhere to be seen but probably not allowed back there anyway, he was in some stupid little gown and the contractions were still coming. It took a doctor twenty freaking minutes to come and see him and by then he was ready to get Kurt a paper bag.

"It seems like the baby wants to join us, so we'll get you scheduled in for a C-section." No fucking shit. He's always known that he'd have to be cut open to get the kid out, but they'd expected that he'd go into labour and they'd know when the baby was ready to be delivered. "I'll have one of the nurses get you ready and have you in there shortly. Don't worry Mr. Puckerman; you'll have your baby soon."

"It's just routine, right? I mean this stuff must happen all the time." Kurt seems more anxious than Puck, but maybe it's just that he wasn't really aware of how the baby would be joining them. Or he'd just chosen not to think about it.

"They always knew they'd have to cut her out. I mean, there's nowhere else for her to come out." They'd already had to cut him open when he'd miscarried her brother, so it stood to reason they'd have to go in the same way to get her out. Maybe they'd leave him with symmetrical scars.

"But they seem pretty sure. I mean, you're both going to be fine, right?"

Puck had nothing to say to that, so he just shrugged. He wasn't sure if the male pregnancy could really be routine, or if they could be sure about any operation. He'd already scared the shit out of himself with a few stories about complications during surgery and shit like that. Wasn't sure if the doctor's confidence was a good thing or just bluster. He didn't comment when Kurt reached out to grab his hand, or when he placed the other over the swell of their baby. He just sighed and held onto Kurt's fingers for his own support.

#

When Puck wakes up, he feels like shit. It's like this wall of agony just hit him the second he regained consciousness and it's not fucking fun at all. He's kind of groggy, but he can tell that it's after the section, which means he's officially a parent again. Trying to move is a little bit of a pain, in both senses, because his side hurts like a bitch and he's stiff as hell.

"Hey, careful." Kurt helps him finish shifting; sitting at the edge of his bed and a light snore draws his attention to Finn in the corner.

"At least you're not fighting this time." It's possibly the one good thing about everything. "What happened?" He remembered being taken in; they wanted to keep him coherent through the surgery so that they could monitor everything. But he can't really remember anything other than being in the operating room and the initial cut because the sound had been utterly disgusting.

"They had to sedate you, there was a, there was a complication." That word has been in his head for far too long. "They delivered the baby, she's perfect. Ten fingers and toes, I'm pretty sure Santana is still at the nursery watching her so that they don't switch her. But the um, I don't know if it was afterbirth or the sac or what, but they had to like, clean out your insides and they said there was excessive bleeding. You were unconscious for a while, but, they said everything seems okay now." Puck's just glad that Santana is watching over his daughter, because that means she's fine, she's okay and everything is fine.

"Why're you still here? Thought you'd've gone home." Kurt just raises an eyebrow at Puck and yeah, okay, maybe not home. But Puck had thought Kurt would be wherever the baby was. That was why he was there.

"The doctors said that they'd had the opportunity to, well, to remove the um, the womb and stuff. They asked for my permission to do so." Puck's not sure why that should make any difference. "They'd already given me the baby to hold and then they asked that, and I was just, I just thought, what if you wanted to, one day, what if you wanted another? What if you wanted her to have a little brother or sister? I didn't want to make the wrong choice."

"You said no?"

"I did it wrong, didn't I? God, I'm sorry. I don't know why you'd ever want to go through-"

"Kurt, shut up, it's okay." He kind of doesn't know if he would go through it again, if he would want another that way or if he'd go the whole conventional thing and let the chick carry the kid. Before it hadn't been an issue. And he's not even sure what he'd define himself as sexuality wise. It's just not something he's had time to think about. "I'll figure it out later, but thanks. For not taking the decision away from me." Kurt just nods. "Nice as this is, when can I see my daughter?"

"Hang on," Kurt just laughs, "I'll go get the nurses."

#

"What's her name?"

"Hannah." He totally caved to his sisters’ constant argument for the name; he kind of liked it anyway. And Sarah was over the moon about the whole thing. She'd already told everyone she could that she named her niece.

"That's lovely," Blaine smiles at Hannah and Puck doesn't even care right then, curled up with Hannah on his chest in the Hudmel living room. It's the first time a lot of them have gotten to see Hannah, since Puck was released with her and ordered to rest because it was a big operation, and Carole has been limiting the excitement in the house; he's literally seen his family and Santana, and of course the Hudson-Hummel clan, for the last week. "Little Hannah Hummel." Everyone knew by then that Kurt was the one Puck had been sleeping with but he'd pretty much leapt straight to Blaine. No one brought it up (and Puck knew that Rachel, Quinn and Santana were aware of his feelings on the matter, Mercedes probably was too, but Blaine just flung it around sometimes).

"Puckerman." Santana is like some kind of guard dog (in the nicest way possible). Puck doesn't need to even mention when something is getting to him, because Santana is on it like a fat kid on cake.

"What?" Blaine is usually the source of Santana's wrath if Finn's stories are anything to go by. Puck's not entirely sure why, because it's not like Puck's overly obvious about his dislike for the house elf.

"Her name is Hannah Puckerman." And it is. It's on her birth certificate, because Puck is the one who fucking carried her for eight and a half months (like she'd keep to schedule) and this isn't the nineteenth century or whatever, so Hannah can have his name instead of Kurt's. They're both technically her dads since neither of them are female although Puck was the one pregnant, so it shouldn't matter. And Kurt has been there for everything; Kurt saw her before he did, Kurt was there when they checked her over, Kurt was the one who took both Puck and Hannah home, he's listed as the 'father' on her birth certificate, everything so far, Kurt's been there for. Including the three in the morning feeds (since one time Puck fell asleep standing in the kitchen with his head against the counter and Kurt took over).

"So much for inclusion then." Blaine mutters it under his breath as he leans back in his seat and Puck can see the guys looking for somewhere else to be.

"You know, I think Hannah wants another bottle. I'll just go boil up the kettle." Rachel is dragged out of the room by Quinn, Mercedes sort of following.

"I think I should know how this works. We should all learn how to make up bottles." It's like a mass exodus of the room, only San, Kurt, Puck, Finn and Blaine remaining behind while Artie slowly wheels after all the others into the kitchen (and Puck can only imagine how they're all fitting in there).

"Listen here, oompa loompa," Santana is without a doubt worse than Puck when it comes to names for Blaine. "Whatever happens with Hannah has nothing to do with you. It's Puckerman and Ladyface that are raising her. If Puck wants to call her Princess Delilah Archibald Magenta Lopez, he can." He really, really wouldn't. "If he wants her to be a hippy, or if they decide to raise her as a Mormon. Nothing to do with you, curly fries." It wasn't like Puck was calling all the shots, although his major stipulation was that Kurt accept that Hannah would be raised Jewish (his mother had the zeved habat organised before Hannah was even out of the hospital).

"How is that raising her together? She has nothing from Kurt; it's all Puck's choice." Puck is still nursing Hannah, sort of ignoring Blaine's objections, because he's talked things over with Kurt already any way.

"Yes she does," he doesn't look over at Blaine, running his hand over the back of his daughter's head, stroking her soft hair, "her middle name's Elizabeth." Yeah, she had Puck's name, and Puck's religion, but she took her middle name for her grandmother she'd never know and she looked like Kurt; the pale skin, the big eyes, the soft brown hair. Puck just knew she'd grow up looking like Kurt.

Santana has her smug thing going on, she's been a little more bitchy towards Blaine since Puck had Hannah, and he's not really sure but there has to be a story behind that and Puck hasn't been following it too much because he's got his daughter home and that's where his attention is. He'll let Santana get her claws out because she's always been in his corner since the moment she knew and that's what matters. She's already as good as Hannah's aunt, just like Finn is totally her uncle and the rest of glee too. Because when he really looks at it, he's not doing any of this alone.

Blaine goes quiet, and Kurt doesn't say a word, and Puck knows he's missed something, but the rest of the gang come back and Puck manages to give up Hannah long enough for Quinn to feed her and Rachel to burp her and have a few cuddles and then Mercedes puts her to bed. There's a definite change in the atmosphere, even while everyone's attention is on Hannah it's evident that they can feel how awkward things are. Puck's just surprised that it's not him feeling awkward.

"Hey, I'll keep an eye on her," Kurt gives him a small nudge as Hannah is laid down in her Moses basket to sleep, "why do you go catch a quick nap?" He's not sure if it's because he's still getting used to not being pregnant or if it's a parent thing, but he hardly sleeps because he's prone to wondering if Hannah is okay. It means he's hardly functioning sometimes, but he's more concerned with his daughter.

"Awesome, I'm gonna grab a shower first." His shoulder bumps Kurt's in quiet thanks, because he's aware that he's not getting enough sleep, but it's not like he means it. And really, Hannah is his kid, he's technically the mom and all that, so isn't he meant to be the one losing sleep and stuff? He'll still welcome a quick nap and shower while Kurt watches the baby though. And Santana and Finn are there, so she'll be fine.

#

Finn checks on him an hour and a half later; as if he'd need help with the sleeping thing or something. But the point is, he's not sleeping when Finn creeps into the room (he's still sharing a room with Finn, something that Finn is kind of stoked for or whatever, because Hannah's cot is set up in there too) so he figures now is as good a time as any to find out what's going on.

"Finn, what's going on with San and Blaine?" Finn stares at him for a minute, as if he's talking some other language.

"What? Nothing. It's fine. What makes you think there's something?" How the hell Finn managed to lie for two months about being Hannah's dad, Puck has no idea.

"Dude, just spill. What happened?"

"It was after they brought Hannah out to Kurt, you know while you were still in surgery. They gave him the baby and they were telling us that you were having some troubles, but the doctor said that you'd be fine. He kept calling you Kurt's partner, kept telling Kurt that his partner would be fine, and Kurt never corrected him." Puck could understand the doctor making the assumption, when he'd seen Puck and Kurt it hadn't exactly been obvious that they weren't together. He's not sure why that's significant. "I don't know for sure what Blaine said, but Santana went off on him right there in the hospital. A lot of it was Spanish, so I don't know what she said either." He can picture it though, Santana's fuse is short, and when it comes to certain things she just explodes in a Latina firework display. Apparently, Puck and Hannah are part of that.

"And Kurt didn't smack her down?" It's probably a little weird, but he's always kind of wondered who would come out on top in a bitch off; Santana or Kurt.

"Kurt was a little too caught up in Hannah and you bleeding too much and complications to really respond to anything." Finn shrugged slightly. "Kurt and Blaine don't seem to be so close right now." Puck had noticed, but he'd figured it was more because of Hannah really. Kurt didn't want to miss anything, just like Puck didn't want to miss anything, so they were just always at home. But everyone else goes back to school in a week, Puck has another two before he's back at McKinley, and that'll change things. Only Kurt and Blaine don't go to the same school anymore, so maybe things wouldn't be easier. Puck had no idea, he didn't even know if he cared. He didn't rightly want to cause a break up, but it wasn't as if he was overly fond of Blaine anyway.

"Probably just the timing or whatever, like one of those rough patches." He wasn't going to think too hard about it; because if Kurt and Blaine broke up on their own, well, that wasn't as if he was making Kurt dump his boyfriend. It was a whole other thing. And if he did think too hard on it he'd just fall to conclusions and mess things up and he had to face facts, there was a reason Puck had to do the first few months of pregnancy alone. Kurt wasn't interested beyond Hannah, so they'd just be civil for Hannah and Kurt could date whoever the hell he pleased.

"Right, it's just timing or whatever." The way Finn rolls his eyes and shakes his head before leaving is not comforting at all.

#



Truth be told, Puck totally loves having Hannah to himself while everyone else is at school. It gives him the time to just chill with his daughter; she's ridiculously adorable, makes the weirdest noises ever, is addictive to cuddle with and not entirely demanding. Puck's not sure how this child could be his and Kurt's but there it is. She doesn't keep them up all night either; she goes down at nine, wakes for a feed at midnight, then again at three and then she sleeps through until seven when she wants another feed. Puck and Kurt aren't up and down with a crying baby, although she does prefer to always have someone's attention and appears to be far more fond of males than females (strangely, Santana is the exception to this). She's already got Burt and Carole wrapped around her tiny little fist.

It really is great how much help everyone offers, but sometimes Puck just wants that time with her away from everyone. Her zeved habat was a showcase of this; it was really just a sort of party for everyone to come to at the hall by the JCC, Hannah was named officially and things, the Rabbi did a blessing and then there was food and drink and music. And everyone kept stealing his baby from him. He spent the entire day trying to get her back, managing only when Santana scared off three Jewish women and Carole told everyone that her little bones would be getting sore from the handling.

She's good with people though, in ways that Puck would never have been. She'll sleep through some epic fights (Santana and Quinn) or some horrifying dance attempt (Rachel and Finn) and the worst television shows (Blaine, Kurt, Sarah, Mercedes and Tina). And what Puck just loves is lying her out on the floor and letting her kick around and gurgle 'til he just can't leave her alone and then he'll just swaddle her up again. Kurt comes home from school early on the days where his last period is a study hall, Puck gets that he doesn't like being gone so much, and Puck isn't sure how he's going to handle things next week when he's back.

"Hey," Kurt keeps his voice down as he drops his back and hangs his jacket over the back of the couch, moving to sit beside Puck on the floor in front of where Hannah was playing. "How's she been?" There are a few days where she's a bit of a fuss, Carole says its natural because she's so young and getting used to everyone. There are days she'll cry if she's not in Puck or Kurt's arms and days she'll do nothing but sleep on top of Burt's chest while Deadliest Catch plays on the television.

"She's been good. She's been alright, we've just sort of playing around, fed her, changed her."

"Barely looked away." There's a smirk on Kurt's face and Puck knows that he gets ribbed about just how bad he can get with her; but she's tiny and his and there's no reason not to be. "So, listen, Mike's got this night all organised, video games and sci-fi movies, he's celebrating his parents being gone for two days really quietly."

"Yeah, the Chang's would freak the fuck out if Mike threw a party. Hell, I'd freak out if Mike threw a party, it's just not Mike." The guy went to parties, he didn't have his own. "You going or something? It's cool; I can manage to pull myself together at three for one night." He could really, he was fairly certain that if he was on his own, he'd manage fine with Hannah as she is now, because she's such an awesome baby and doesn't make him crazy (officially the only girl who doesn't).

"I was thinking you would go." Kurt looks at him like he's ready for something to go off or whatever; Puck just raises his eyebrow in question. "It's just, you told me that we weren't going to stop living our lives just because we had a daughter, and you've pretty much stopped living your life for the last seven months. She's three weeks old, I think it's okay if you go out for a few hours and have fun." Which, okay, fair point. It wasn't like Puck was completely putting his life on hold or anything though; it was just that he didn't want to miss anything. Even though she was small and just slept and shit and puked most of the time, he was still there for it all.

"So, you're going to give up your night to stay in with her?"

"Noah, I'm not giving up anything. I'll do my homework, look after her. Blaine is going to come over for a while." Puck wasn't sure how he felt about going out and leaving Kurt and Blaine to play house with Hannah. But he'd been the one agreeing to things and setting the whole thing where he and Kurt raise her together but aren't together thing. He supposed he just needed to deal with Kurt and Blaine, because it was the reality of the situation and Hannah would need to get used to him.

"Okay. Yeah, you know, you're right." So he called up Mike to say yeah, he'd be along, he wasn't staying too late, but he'd show up. He's a little apprehensive, because he's leaving Hannah at home and going out, and seriously, is he that much of a pussy he seriously doesn't want to go?

"You know, when Finn was just a baby, I didn't go out for nine weeks. I just stayed in the house with him the whole time. I missed so much, Noah. That's not what's meant to happen." Carole strokes the back of Puck's hair, smiling at him softly before bending to kiss Hannah's forehead. "You'll enjoy yourself, and she'll be here when you come home." She slips her earring into place and kisses his cheek before heading off for her night out with Burt. Puck just tells himself to get over it, kiss his daughter goodnight and go out.

Kurt's more than capable of looking after their daughter, he doesn't even care when she throws up on his shirts or whatever, he just sighs and cleans her up and gets on with it. It's not that Puck doesn't think that Kurt can do it. It's just that Puck doesn't really want to leave Hannah at all, never mind leaving her with Kurt and Blaine. And it's the Blaine part that he's not so keen on, because without a doubt, Kurt's a great parent. But these are all things that Puck can't say, because he's letting Kurt love whoever he wants, and if that's Blaine then Puck needs to deal. So he goes out, he tries not to think too much on what time would be okay to go home without being rude and just tries to enjoy himself.

And he does, because it's a night with the guys and Puck finally feels like he's not been tossed back into being too old too soon, he's just his seventeen year old self again and it's good for him. He still beats the shit out of Sam at Halo, still leaves Finn in the dust at Mario Kart and he's still the only one who really gets Mike's obsession with Pulp Fiction (it's John Travolta being badass and dancing like a loon, and Samuel L. being his awesome self, how can you not love it?) so it's good. It's great really, even if he doesn't stay the night like most of the guys are doing. He catches a ride home with Artie's dad, tossing Artie a fist bump as he heads out to the Hudmel house which has quickly become his and Hannah's home and actually surprises himself that it's almost two in the morning.

He's not exactly prepared to walk in on Blaine and Kurt making out on the sofa (it's that whole clichéd babysitting and making out thing, but it's to be expected maybe) and he really wishes he could just slam the door, but Hannah's probably sleeping and that shit wouldn't be cool. He's not about to disturb his daughter just because Blaine has his tongue in Kurt's mouth. He just didn't really prepare himself for seeing shit like that, and it stings a little, because it's just another reminder that Kurt picked someone else. But Kurt pulls back the moment he realises that Puck's back, looking a little embarrassed and Puck can remember when it used to be Puck doing that with Kurt, and Kurt was never embarrassed after, he usually was too dazed to be anything other than pleasantly debauched. Not that he's comparing or anything.

"You're home early." Kurt makes a point on standing from the sofa, although Blaine doesn't, he just leans back with a slight frustrated expression on his face.

"It's like two in the morning," Puck points out, glancing between them. "I would've been home at ten but Artie started a debate on the differences in the CGI in Avatar and Star Wars, to that took up about three hours’ worth of arguing." Puck just shrugged a shoulder, waiting to see if Kurt actually figured out he was joking. "How was she?"

"Fine," the smile that appears on Kurt's face is one Puck knows well, because he has the exact same one whenever anyone asks him anything about Hannah. "She's been perfect actually, haven't heard anything out of her since I put her down." Kurt frowns a little but Puck just nods and heads towards the stairs. He figures he'll check in on her, get himself ready for bed and by then she should be up for her three am feed. Except, when he gets to the room, Hannah's lying on her back, feet in the air, gargling away to herself perfectly content. The issue isn't that she's upset or wanting fed or anything like that, it's that he didn't hear her, and they have a baby monitor in the living room for exactly that purpose.

"Hey sweetheart, c'mere and we'll get you something to settle you, eh?" He just has to pick her up and she's snuggling into him like the content little thing that she is. But as he walks downstairs Kurt and Blaine stand up to meet him at the bottom of the stairs. "She was awake, eating her feet," and it wasn't like she'd just woken up or something. "Did you forget the monitor?"

"No," Kurt is still frowning, even as he moves to the hand held over by the couch on the table. "I swear I didn't, Noah. I turned it on before I even put her down." They all made a point of it, because she could get a little fussy sometimes so listening for her was just easier if it was one before she went into her cot. And Puck wasn't the only one who'd read far too many warnings and safety tips and horrific stories about babies and cot deaths and he was not going to forget those any time soon. "I don't understand." The power is flicked off on the monitor and Puck just sighs.

It's not like anything bad happened, it's not even like she was crying or hurt or anything like that. But she could've been. Easily.

"I'm so sorry, Noah."

"Why are you apologising? It's not like you did it on purpose, you just forgot to turn it on." Blaine crosses his arms over his chest, still a little rumpled from his and Kurt's earlier activities and really, Puck would punch him this time if he didn't have his daughter curled into his chest. "Accidents happen."

"I did turn it on. I didn't forget. I turned it on." Kurt is pretty adamant, from the glare that he's suddenly throwing at Blaine, and Puck's pretty sure that he probably did turn the monitor on. It could've just not clicked right or something, so he's not going to make a big deal out of it.

"It's okay Kurt, really." He just figures that it won't happen again, because Puck's done with nights away from Hannah anyway. "I'll just get her a bottle and put her down; you guys have a nice night." He thinks that's pretty decent of him, right? And he's not exactly spewing venom or whatever, so that's good for him too. He gives them a nod and heads through to the kitchen, balancing Hannah in the cradle of his arm while getting her bottle made up and warmed. He gets that Kurt has more than just Hannah going on; Kurt's got college applications and student class president elections and his boyfriend and the school show or whatever to be dealing with. So it's not like Puck expects that Kurt's going to stop whatever he's doing for Hannah, but Puck, he's not really got that much going on. Glee will be the biggest thing when he gets back at school, maybe football if he's able to go back. But Puck's always going to think about Hannah first and foremost, because Hannah is what he's got to think about now. Kurt still has all his life ahead of him and stuff.

"I swear, Noah, I definitely turned it on," Kurt trails into the kitchen while Puck's waiting for the kettle to boil, rocking Hannah slightly. "I have no idea how it didn't click on, I know that it did. I heard her a few times." Puck's not angling for a fight or anything, but maybe if Kurt was less involved with sucking face he'd have noticed. Not that he's going to say it, it's just his opinion.

"Seriously, it's not a big deal. She's okay, everything is fine, we're good."

"No, we're not. You're being passive aggressive and obviously this is bothering you but you're not saying anything, it's just going to cause a fight down the line, so we need to deal with it now." Puck's pretty sure that Kurt has been talking to Miss. Pillsbury about raising a baby with someone, that she has pamphlets or something that she's given him. That or self-help books.

"Okay, I just think that maybe if you'd been paying more attention to what was going on, you'd have noticed she was too quiet and it wouldn't have even been a thing, happy?"

"Is this about me having Blaine here?"

"No, okay, I don't care about Blaine." Like at all. "It's about priorities, and I don't expect you to make her yours, but she's always going to be mine." The kettle pops and Puck fills up the jug with the bottle in it to heat Hannah's feed, the little girl pressing her ear over Puck's chest and just listening to his heartbeat. He knows that this is probably going to start something with Kurt, something like Kurt wanting to be just as involved and trying to juggle everything and the idiot working himself to the bone just to prove it to Puck when he doesn't even need to. "You've got a lot going on, and it's fine. So just don't worry about this stuff." Puck tests the bottle, drying the outside of it and shifting Hannah in his arms. "I got it; just go back to your boyfriend, okay?"

Kurt stares after Puck as he leaves the room and Puck's certain that this isn't the end of their conversation.

#

Puck goes back to school the following Monday; he's not happy about it, but his mother refuses to let him drop out and Carole and she already worked out a way to make sure Hannah is taken care of while he's at school. He has the classes he needs to graduate and that's it. Rachel won't even hear of him dropping from glee (there's something about family and working Hannah into the family and all this bullshit that he stops listening to and just gives up) and Coach Beiste really wants him to stay on the team, so he does. It's all the extra-curricular he wants never mind needs and it takes up enough time away from Hannah.

He spent the weekend with her at his own house; his ma had the weekend off work so she wanted them to spend time together as a family. They went to the Shabbat service, hung around the JCC for a while, went out for dinner and Sunday was spent doting around the house with Hannah and Sarah making noise and mess. Puck's pretty sure; disappointment in being a grandmother when her son isn't even legal smoking age yet aside, his ma is over the moon about Hannah. He can kind of see why.

But sitting in history class, playing knots and crosses with Britt on a sheet of paper when they're meant to be learning about the Napoleonic wars, well, it's just hammering home how over this whole school thing he is. Yeah, if he wasn't in school he'd need to get a job, and that would take him away from Hannah for a few hours each day too. But at least he'd feel like he was actually doing something and not just sitting around bored in class. It's not even like he's stupid or any of that shit, people think he is because his grades are shit and he barely goes to class, but it's just that he can’t be fucked with this bullshit. Who the hell cares about Napoleon and his short complex? Why is Pythagoras important for anything? Does it really matter if he knows what the molecular make up of potassium is? He really doesn't think so.

But he attends class, and he hands in work and the teachers are starting to realise that he is actually pretty smart and that shit. His maths teacher totally thinks he's cheating somehow, but fuck that noise, he's already figured out that he's not gonna be relying on anyone when he gets out of school, he's gonna get a decent fucking grade in his classes, get a decent job in this town and take care of his daughter, no fucking hand-outs. It's cool that Burt and Carole are all for helping just now, and he'll always have his ma and Sarah, but he's gonna be the one taking care of Hannah, and when Kurt goes off to his college dreams in New York, Puck's not planning on overstaying his welcome at the Hudmel house. He'll get an apartment nearby or something, he'll get a job and a place and stop scrounging off his baby-daddy's parents.

So he's the fucking epitome of a well behaved student; he could give Rachel Berry a run for her money. And he's totally not even bothered about going out or whatever. He seriously wishes his friends would get their lives in order though; he hates having to watch Quinn try to get her claws into Finn while Santana is actually having a serious relationship for once in her life, hates having the front row seat to the Blaine and Kurt show which involves arguments and sneers and hand holding and sweet kisses, hates seeing Mercedes go through this stupid weight and body image thing all because of Sam fucking Evans (seriously, if that kid hadn't transferred, Puck would punch him in his stupid face right now). Britt and Artie, Mike and Tina, they're the only ones who actually have shit in order. Rachel is her usual demented self more often than not, but she's full of these helpful little moments that sort of make him forget when she gets all crazy and stuff. Like when they need to do some weekend practice, and Puck is convinced to just bring Hannah along, because they can look after her or whatever. And Rachel legit takes ten minutes out of practice because Hannah is being fussy and she's the nearest to her. It sort of balances out her making them get up at seven in the morning on a Sunday.

So by the time they hit Valentine's Day in their senior year, Blaine and Kurt are off for the third time, Santana and Finn are back on, Quinn is flirting with this transfer kid and Mercedes is getting this attention from someone on the football team that apparently rocks at poetry. And Puck. Well, he hasn't had sex since Kurt knocked him up, a year ago. He thinks there's something vaguely wrong with this, but then Hannah will pat his face or giggle at him and he'll remember that he's got more important things and move on.

And it's not like he means to interrupt Blaine and Kurt's 'let’s figure this out and make up' date the week after V-Day, he doesn't. It's just that he is majorly freaking out and he has no idea what to do and he's not sure if he wants to do it on his own anymore and really, Kurt is the one he'll call because Santana mentioned something about whipped cream and marathons and he's not calling her or Finn right then. He's in the hospital waiting room, pacing back and forth with Hannah screaming her little lungs out, and seriously, this is an emergency, they can't get a doctor from somewhere to see her? Kurt comes tearing into the room, Blaine a little later behind him, less than ten minutes after Puck's exceptionally panicked call to Kurt.

"What's wrong? Have you seen anyone? Why are you still out here?"

"They haven't looked at her, apparently, they are very busy." There are four people in the waiting area; one middle aged guy with a nail in his hand, a pre-teen girl with a bandage around her foot, a dude their age with a compress on his head and blood on his cheek and a mother and daughter duo with a towel under the daughter's chin where blood is seeping out. His little girl is the only one breaking his fucking heart right then. "She's burning up, she's crying, she's fucking inconsolable."

"Right," see, when Kurt pulls out his ice bitch thing, Puck remembers why he's in love with the little priss and fucking kicks himself for turning Kurt down about being together. He has these moments where he wonders if Kurt could love him, if they could make it where his parents didn't, if maybe he could do it better than his ma and make Kurt want to stay with them. He thinks that maybe Kurt loves Hannah enough that it'll work, that they could try it. But his dad loved him at one point too, he knows because he idolised the guy and they were fucking tight. But it's not always enough and he couldn't bear it if Kurt walked away from them down the line. He won't be his parents. But Kurt just keeps reminding him just how much he loves the diva boy. And it's getting harder not to hate himself a little.

Kurt fumes off towards the help desk area, and Puck feels a little bad for the older chick behind there, but then Hannah starts hiccupping through the sobs and he stops feeling anything but concern for her, while Blaine huffs slightly and sits in one of the seats. Puck just goes back to rocking Hannah, trying desperately to just help her in some way; he can't get the fever down, can't placate her at all, she's just crying until it probably hurts her.

"Okay, c'mon, we're going back to wait." Kurt is a little red in the face and the woman behind the desk is a little uncomfortable but Puck doesn't care if it gets Hannah seen.

"Uh-huh. Parents only." The woman doesn't seem to be willing to give in to Kurt completely though. "Just the parents." She glares at Blaine a little, and Puck likes her just a touch more than he did before.

"Seriously? I'm his boyfriend; we're like, all the parents or something." Except Blaine is absolutely not Hannah's parent in any way; Blaine doesn't hold Hannah, or play with her, or feed her, or change her, or bathe her, or even look at her most of the time. Puck figures it's some testament to how Kurt wasn't the blushing virgin Blaine thought he was, and Puck knows that's what Blaine thought Kurt was for the longest time ever.

"I don't care if you're Mother Theresa, unless you are the baby's daddy or mommy, sit your ass down."

"Dude, go have your dinner or whatever you were doing, I'm sorry I called, it's okay, I got her." He just wants to get Hannah down the hall, into a room and have a doctor tell him what is wrong with his baby girl and fix it. He just wants to make it better.

"No, no, I'm staying, Blaine we'll rain check, I'll call you later, just, I'm sorry, but it's-" Kurt shrugs his shoulder just as Hannah lets out another wail and Puck starts towards the room they're directed to. He couldn't care less where Blaine goes (preferably Tahiti) so long as Hannah is okay.

#
Part Three
Tags: !glee, #kurt/blaine, #kurt/puck, *blaine anderson, *ensemble, *finn hudson, *kurt hummel, *noah puckerman, *santana lopez, +mpreg, -nc17, :season 2
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