He's mostly right. Kurt is pretty much scarce from Puck's life the following few days, only showing up when there's a suddenly arranged meet up. Like Quinn's sudden desire for a group movie night, or Mercedes' 'Welcome Home' from wherever she went get together at the Jones' house, or when they accidentally bump into each other at the mall when Sarah is getting new dance shoes.
It's not until three nights before Santana's planned party at Britt's house when he's ordered over to Britt's house. He goes, of course he goes, because he heard Brittany in the background shouting something about a unicorn hat and wanting to use his mohawk as a template so naturally, he'll show up. It's impossible to say no to Brittany.
So he's sitting on Britt's sofa, back on the seat, feet over the back of the furniture while Britt sits on the floor and pretty much just plays with his hair. He's waiting for Santana and Quinn to come out of the kitchen from their planning or something, they still haven't told him why he's there.
"What's going on with you three anyway?" He's never actually gotten a straight answer out of Quinn, no pun intended. But Santana keeps dropping hints that they are definitely a threesome, so Britt's the best person to give a candid answer really.
"San wants to include Quinn in our relationship, I'm okay with it, but Quinn's still thinking on it. She's letting us convince her." Puck is aware of Santana's method of convincing people, and good for Quinn maybe. Might help her chill out or whatever, but maybe it's what she needs anyway, Britt and San sort of balance everything out, and Quinn would probably just balance it even better or whatever. "Did you hear about Sam and Mercedes?" He gives a slight nod before she tugs his hair to keep him still. "What do you think of that?"
"It's whatever I guess. Probably be good for Mercedes though, give her something to do for herself rather than being the single girl, y'know?" This time, Britt just gives him a noise that might be her agreeing with him, but it might be her figuring out what the hell she's doing with his hair too, so he's not entirely sure.
"Didn't your mother ever teach you how to sit properly?" Quinn gave his bare feet a flick with her fingernails as she came in, scoffing at his position on the sofa.
"I started out sitting perfectly normal, but Britt got tired of standing, so here I am." He would've shrugged, but he kind of doesn't want Britt pulling his hair again. "How did the strategy meeting go?" It's amusing, the lengths they're going to over this, really it is.
"How do you feel about a rigged game of Seven Minutes?" He raises an eyebrow at Santana, because seriously? That's the big plan, a rigged game of Seven Minutes? Then again, he can do rather a lot in seven minutes, not enough to really make it count but...
"You are remembering that Blaine is going to be there this time? And Kurt will be going home with Blaine. What's the point in shoving us in a closet for seven minutes so that he can get all hot and bothered and just go home with the hobbit to take care of it?" Puck's not exactly sure where Kurt is in his relationship with Blaine, it's not like they've talked at length about it or whatever. It's not like they've talked at all really.
"Please, we remember who is going to be at the party, but we're always very aware of just how fantastic your mouth is." Santana winks at him while Britt giggles a little and Puck just raises his eyebrow at her, which is a little weird since he's looking at her upside down.
He's not sure about their idea of Seven Minutes, it just seems too far-fetched that Kurt would even give in to anything in the seven minutes they'd be alone, and even if he did, Blaine would still be there to go home with. Britt suddenly gets worried that she doesn't have enough stuff for the party and she needs Santana to check everything off with her, which means they vanish for a while and Puck finally gets to sit upright and let the blood drain from his brain for a bit.
"It sounds like you're getting a little serious about Kurt." Quinn shifts from the far seat to join him on the sofa, and Puck just shrugs. Because sure, he kind of has. He's getting the impression that Kurt's at least thought about it too, maybe Kurt's not thought about being with Puck instead of Blaine, but he's definitely considered what they did. Puck can tell from the way Kurt blushes sometimes, or the way he watches Puck's mouth, or the fact that he climbed into Puck's lap to suck his face the night he'd stayed at their house.
"Well, what's the point of breaking them up if I'm just in it for sex? Yeah, I'm serious, it's not just--" Honestly, he doesn't know what it is right then. It's not just sex, because he's pretty sure that's not what Kurt's into, and that's not what he's looking for anymore. But he's not sure what it is either.
"Santana and Brittany assure me that I'm not messing up their relationship by joining them. They seem pretty genuine. Like," Quinn shrugs a little.
"San just got herself in order with Britt, she's always been struggling to find somewhere to be your friend but not give up to your Queen Bitch ways. You really think she'd try to haul you into a relationship with her and Britt if she hadn't considered it?" Puck knows more about the Brittany and Santana dynamic than anyone really, Britt was pretty candid at times and he'd hooked up with Santana for long enough that she needed to get her lady-kisses on and he was down with that. It was lesbian porn and it was free, so hell yeah he knew about the two of them.
"I guess. I just, I don't want to be a novelty. Like, just something that's fun for a while."
"Shit, Q," Puck wrapped an arm around her, because he knew that feeling, hell, she'd made him feel that once or twice too, "they care about you, okay. So shut up, 'cause it isn't like that."
"I made a bet with Santana." Quinn smirks against Puck's shoulder, cuddling in against him, and he's surprised at how fine he is with this mostly platonic friendship he's struck up with these three smokin' hot girls. "If she can get Rachel to make out with her at the party, I'll agree to exclusively dating Santana and Brittany." Puck raised an eyebrow and thought on that for a minute, sighing slightly.
"I have all kinds of crazy images in my head and really it's just a mass of hot, naked female body parts." The swat to the shoulder was worth it when she laughed and loosened up.
Somehow, he gets roped into helping out at Britt's the day of the party. Britt's limited it to jocks, Cheerio's and the glee club, plus Blaine. So she knows that no one is going to wreck her house because Santana will murder the first person that upsets Britt.
It means there is a lot more drinking going on. There's beer pong set up in the kitchen, a group of Cheerio's are sitting playing 'Fuzzy Duck' with Tina and Mercedes, Britt and San are doing body shots off some of the football team and Finn's trying to teach Kurt and Blaine how to play Sambuca 6 from watching Puck and Quinn.
"I can't! I can't do another one." She's laughing at him, gripping his arm to keep herself upright and he just ignores her and fills up the twelve shot glasses in from of them again. "No, Puck, no more, I'm--"
"One more go, then we'll find some water, 'kay?" He's totally buzzed at this point, he's already kicked ass at beer pong and got to do a shot off Rachel as he walked from the kitchen to the sitting room via the dining room where Britt and San held court.
"Okay, one more. One!" It's better to do just one more, since Quinn's almost at the falling over stage of her drunkenness, he's just grateful she's not being angry-girl-drunk Quinn again, because he had bruises the last time.
So they get the sugar paper that Britt got specifically for this game and have another go, both of them half listening to Finn explain things to Kurt and Blaine in his rambling drunk way. Puck gets all six of his and Quinn's laughing hysterically as she misses four out of the six. He still gets her to drink two of them anyway before she just flattens herself to his chest and pours the other two into his open mouth.
"Hey, hey," he's in the process of swallowing them when she pushes up on her tip toes and kisses him, some of the alcohol spilling between their mouths before she practically drinks it from his mouth. He's dimly aware of the encouragement from Blaine and Finn behind him, as Quinn pushes her fingers into his mohawk and sucks on his tongue before pulling away and biting his lower lip and leaving him with just a wink.
"Right, you guys aren't getting back together." Finn just nudges his shoulder and it nearly propels him into Blaine since his balance is shot to hell when he's drunk.
"We can't." He says it to Finn, even as he's starting to lean on Blaine, until he realises who he's leaning on and who is standing beside Blaine and that just makes him depressed. "She doesn't have a boyfriend."
"Well, isn't that the role you would fill?" Blaine laughs at him and Puck just makes a noise before patting the little hobbit on the head like he was a pet.
"No, see, I'm the one they cheat on their boyfriends with. Not date." Yeah, he's getting morose, that sucks. He pulls a face, the alcohol in his mouth starting to taste a little bitter. "I need to find Brittany. I need her happy unicorn stuff." He pushes away from Blaine, walking around Finn to find the dining room and San and Britt. San's got Rachel doing some shots, it looks like she's trying to convince the diva that San should totally take a shot from between her breasts and it looks like Quinn might need to make good on her bet.
Puck just wraps his arms around Britt's waist from behind, hugging her back against him and pressing his nose to her neck. She giggles lightly and reaches up to pet his mohawk while they both watch Santana get Rachel's top off and sit a shot glass between Rachel's boobs. She fills it up, spilling a little over Rachel's skin that instantly gets licked up before San carries on, licking Rach's collarbone and salting it and giving Rachel the lime wedge to hold between her teeth.
"San's been working on Rachel all night." Britt whispers, her hands moving to hold his over her stomach, "Quinn's been encouraging it." It pretty much tells Puck that Quinn's sure about this threesome thing, and it's hot as fuck, but it's probably gonna be good for the three of them too. Rachel giggles as San licks the salt, bends down to take the shot and then moves in for the wedge, definitely taking her time with pulling away from Rachel's mouth.
"I need some unicorn magic." He mumbles it against her throat, because he doesn't want this to turn into him being a morose drunk. He's pretty sure that whatever little plan Santana and Britt and Quinn came up with, it's shot to hell because Kurt hasn't left Blaine's side all night and hasn't been drinking much at all, which means his guard is up and there's nothing to blame, so Puck's pretty much given up on San's devious master plan.
"Aww," Britt turns around in his grip and kisses his lips lightly, "c'mon, we'll get you some!" Britt sort of lets Santana know that Puck's stealing her for a little while, because if anyone can perk up his drunken mood, it's Britt, and they weave through the kitchen until Britt can make him up one of her special little drinks. It's actually just sugary punch, Puck knows there's not a drop of alcohol in it at all, because Britt gives it to her kid sister and even Brittany isn't that nuts.
But he nurses it for the rest of the night, even after Britt kicks the jocks out 'cause one of them pissed in her sink, and the Cheerio's start to patter out and it's eventually some just of the glee club left. Artie couldn't make it at all, and Puck thinks it might actually have something to do with his break up with Britt and Britt hooking up with San, but he doesn't say anything, and Sam and Mercedes bailed earlier on.
"Guess what time it is!" Britt comes out with the empty bottle and grins at them, even as there are a few voices that almost call halt to it. "Shut up, we're down to the glee club, it's like tradition, get over it." Drunk Britt is a forceful Britt and Puck nudges Quinn to give her an eyebrow wiggle to make sure she notices this. Quinn giggles and buries her head in Puck's neck.
So they get into their circle, Puck notices that Quinn shuffles next to him and grabs Britt down next to her and Santana automatically gets the spot next to Britt. San is almost directly opposite Rachel, she's probably scheming again.
"How about we spice this up a little though?" He totally called Santana's scheming again.
"No sex dice, Santana, c'mon," Quinn's the one that says no, even as she leans on Puck to keep herself upright. Rachel has the sofa to lean against since she's in almost the same state and she seems to be agreeing with Quinn.
"I wasn't gonna say sex dice, we've done that. How about spin the bottle dares?" Oh, they're totally going to find far too many ways to play spin the bottle over this summer.
"Can't we just play normal spin the bottle?" Kurt is almost pleading, and likely enough it's because he's mostly sober and his boyfriend is here. Kissing someone else because of the bottle is fine, but they all know how risqué the dares can get with this group. Even if Santana is the worst, Tina and Britt are just as bad and Mike is a filthy minded quiet boy.
"I think it sounds fun." Kurt gapes at Blaine, who just shrugs slightly, "I've never played anything different from plain old spin the bottle."
"Right, and we're letting Blaine get new experiences, okay. So, here's how it goes. We start with Quinn," it looks like Quinn's about to argue, but she stops, "and I dare Quinn to give a hickey to whoever the bottle lands on. But it can't be on the neck." Santana's smirking at Quinn while Q just blushes, leaning off Puck to take her turn.
"You're so not getting any from me for a week." She mutters it so that Puck is the only one that catches it, and her eyes roll as the bottle lands on Blaine. Puck stiffens just a little, but Blaine looks just as apprehensive so Quinn gives him a soft smile before crawling across the circle to him and taking his wrist in her hand before sucking a hickey onto the pulse point right there.
"No! Hey!" Santana doesn't look amused that her little plan was foiled.
"You just said it couldn't be the neck," Britt's smug rocking on the spot. "You gotta word things better San." So when Quinn pulled away, and Blaine had his new hickey on his wrist, San just rolled her eyes. "Okay, now Quinn gets to pick Blaine's dare."
"Okay, um, I dare you to let us blind fold you and whoever you spin the bottle on has kiss you without touching anywhere but your lips." Blaine blushed, but nodded along and San was the one who went off to get a scarf from Britt's coat cupboard to wrap around Blaine's eyes. Kurt helped him lean forward to get the bottle and he spun.
Quinn leaned over to Puck just as the bottle stopped on Tina, distracting him from watching Tina kiss Blaine without touching him.
"Kurt's sneaking glances at you again." Puck half smirked, noting the way that Quinn left her hand resting on his thigh as she talked against his cheek.
"I might've been an idiot and said something earlier." Twisting to talk to her, Puck missed Tina being dared to give a lap dance on her shot, then he missed Finn kissing a line down Britt's body as his dare while Quinn tried to get the story out of him. "After the kitchen, Finn thought we were getting back together, I think I got a little moody."
"No, I know we're better friends, I like us like this," and he did, because it just worked better and she wasn't all moody and he wasn't all depressed, and he hated when they were like that at the start of last summer. "I said that people don't date me, I'm the guy they cheat with on the guys they're dating."
"Yeah, I was pretty gender neutral about it." He's pretty sure that Kurt's probably watching him to make sure he doesn't get drunker and just tell Blaine that Kurt was as bad as half the other girls who used him as a revenge fuck, only Kurt hadn't been revenge it had just been a drunken thing that left this lingering want. Quinn just sighed and leaned against him, bringing both of their attentions back to their friends who--
"Okay, Britt, I dare you to strip dance for your turn." It's like Finn's forgotten who he's talking to, because Britt's already missing the shirt she'd first wore that day and Puck's fairly certain she had a skirt on earlier, not a dress.
But Britt just laughs and spins the bottle, grinning at Mike when it lands on him and Santana's the one getting out her camera to video this. And Puck's all for watching Brittany get her stripper on, but Quinn tugs at his hand, pulling him up to his feet.
"Hey, no, you can't leave!" Santana looks away from the camera for a minute, but Quinn just waves her hand.
"We're just getting drinks, okay, we'll be right back." Puck decides not to say anything as he's dragged into the kitchen, he's sort of aware that they're being watched, and why would anyone watch him and Quinn leave the room when Britt is getting her clothes off? Why is he letting her drag him out while there is naked Britt happening? But Quinn glances behind her, looking at him and then at the group before tugging him into the kitchen and pushing him against the fridge.
The pots and stuff above the fridge rattle and he grunts a little, until Quinn moves in and gets her teeth on his bottom lip, tugging it harsh enough to get a hiss out of him. She barely gives him a second though, releasing his mouth from her teeth just to suck on his lip and then pull him until their mouths were slanting over the other. Puck only just gets his arm around her waist, pulling her flush against his body as she tugs his 'hawk again, both of them staggering from the fridge to the other side of the kitchen. Normally this would be where she wrapped her legs around his waist and he worked on getting them out of their clothes, but Quinn's busy sucking on his lower lip, alternating to the top one for a moment before digging her teeth in hard enough to hurt.
He has to just pin her to the wall, grab her hands away from his head and pull his mouth away. It doesn't help that she rolls her hips towards him, something he knows Santana has to have showed her, but he can't for the life of him figure out what she would. It rolls her hips into his and he can't stop the groan from the pressure it puts on his very interested cock. His head dips to Quinn's shoulder, resting for barely a second to get himself in check and not just rut into her like he fucking well wants to. Quinn takes the opportunity to bite on his jaw, hard and deep, undoubtedly leaving an indentation of her teeth.
"Woman, what are you doing?" She's flushed, he's aroused, his lip is swollen to hell from her biting and sucking and he knows they look like they've just fucked in the kitchen damnit.
"I'm making Kurt jealous the best way I know how." It stuns him enough that he loosens his grip on her wrists, meaning she slips her arms out of his grip, her hands going to his hips and pushing under his t-shirt to drag her nails over his rib cage. He knows she's leaving marks, the way her nails scorch lines of tingling heat against his skin. His back arches and she moves to meet him, biting his lip again before her mouth closed on his Adam's apple and sucked a mark there.
"Hey, you two!" Santana's voice breaks through the noise of his own blood pulsing in his ears. "When you're finished getting a drink, would you like to re-join us so Puck can get his?" Puck's not all that sure about the tone of San's voice, but Quinn grins at him and pulls him along. She doesn't bother straightening her dress of letting him adjust his pants to at least make the boner more comfortable, but he does manage to grab a bottle of Jack before he's dragged from the kitchen.
He notices the bottle is pointing to where he had been sitting, so Quinn pushes him to sit on the floor, while Quinn sits beside him, finally smoothing out her dress. Puck just unscrews the top of the bottle of Jack and takes a long, burning swig, ignoring the looks from everyone else.
"What did we miss?" He's not entirely sure how Quinn manages that whole unaffected thing right then, least of all with a semi-naked Brittany stroking the inside of her wrist, and Puck is aware of how sensitive the inside of her wrist is.
"I took off my clothes for Mike, and then Mike had to grope Kurt." Puck almost chokes on his drink, only just holding it off because-- Shit, that means it's Kurt's spin and it's on him. But it was Mike to give the dare, right? So it'll be totally tame, right? It takes one glance at Mike to inform Puck that no, no it won't be.
Puck gives a look at Kurt, eyebrow raised and Kurt just glances a Blaine who shrugs and then Puck's just floored because Kurt just gets up, walks over and plants himself in Puck's lap before kissing him. It must be then that Kurt notices the erection, because he shifts slightly, ass rubbing into Puck's dick and Puck's the one gasping into Kurt's mouth. The nibble on his lip hurts, enough that he's ready to pull back, but Kurt grips to his neck to keep him there, licking over his mouth to sooth it before plunging his tongue past Puck's lips to press against Puck's tongue, coaxing Puck deeper into the kiss.
It started to become rather obvious to Puck, as Kurt pressed his hips down into Puck's lap, keeping his hands on either side of Puck's face, fingers digging in to Puck's neck, that the lip lock wasn't ending any time soon, and he started to wonder if this was another of those 'kiss for x amount of time' things. Then Kurt rolled his hips and ground into Puck's dick, swallowing the moan in Puck's mouth and he stopped thinking beyond Kurt's lips and tongue and mouth and body pressing to his.
"Um, that's seven minutes." It's Mike's voice, and Kurt growls against Puck's mouth, biting sharply, and Puck could almost take it as a punishment or something, especially with the way that Kurt pull back, huffs and climbs from Puck's lap without another word.
Puck's about to wash the taste of Kurt out of his mouth with some Jack, ignore everyone and spin the fucking bottle when Tina leans over, offering him a napkin.
"Your lip's bleeding." He presses the back of his hand against his mouth and sure enough, it comes away bloody. It must've been that last bite, and hell if Puck can figure out just what the hell that was all about. He takes the napkin from Tina, dabbing his lip before just sucking it into his mouth and scowling at the bottle in front of him.
"What's his dare, Kurt?" Quinn leans over to wipe at his mouth with the napkin, apparently the bite was sharp enough that his lip just keeps bleeding and Kurt's just staring at him. At least he looks sorry.
"Um," Kurt just shrugs, almost looking at Santana for guidance before he remembers it's Santana, but then she chimes in anyway.
"You have to get the next person off. Hand or mouth, doesn't matter. There needs to be an orgasm." Santana just smirks, leaning forward a little while Kurt looks from Santana to Puck.
"Santana," Britt's frowning, and Puck's wondering if he missed something here.
"Spin the bottle Puckerman." It's a dare, in more than just the game type of way. So he glares at her, trying to figure out if she'd gone from happy drunk to possessive-frustrated-bitchy drunk while Quinn had him in the kitchen. So he spins it, wondering if she's about to stop it on Kurt just so that he can have his mouth further abused. She smirks a little, starts to move but Britt's in there first, like this super fast little thing that she is, her hand clamping on the bottle as it points to Santana.
"Britt," the smirk drops from her face and Puck's pretty sure this party is over, since this weird tension builds among them and Britt and Santana have a staring match until Santana sighs and throws her hands up. "Fine." He's almost sure it means she's going to back down, she'll pick something else or actually let Kurt decide something for them to do, and Puck knows it'll be nothing as drastic as getting her off, but she crawls around Britt and Quinn, ignoring Quinn's shout as she practically pounces on him.
He doesn't get to brace himself, slamming into the floor with a thump of his head and Santana straddling his hips and kissing him. His mouth fucking hurts, the sting from Kurt's bite just flaring up and blood seeping back into his mouth, but Santana follows as he tries to pull away and he's just not up for dealing with her games right then.
Twisting his hips, he rolls them, they end up behind Quinn and Britt, Santana's head just by Finn's place in the circle and Puck pushes her down with his pelvis pressed to her. "You really wanna do this?" He's giving her one out, one chance. San glances behind him and Puck lets Quinn or Britt have their input until San looks back at him and shakes her head.
"Sorry," he just nods, shifting back from between her legs and grabbing her arms, "'m just drunk." He sighs and pulls her to sit in his lap, her legs around his hips and his hand on her butt while she cuddles his neck. She's close to getting weepy, he can tell. "I just got a little jealous."
"S'okay." So he sits back down in the circle, Santana curled on him, and Kurt resolutely not looking at him. "You wanna take your turn, or go to bed?"
"You know, I think bed is a good idea, since we're all very tired and I think it's rather obvious that more than enough alcohol has been consumed tonight." Santana sniffs against Puck's neck and Puck frowns at Rachel.
"Hey, Rach, you never got a turn."
"I-- That's okay, Noah, I--"
"Maybe you should just give San a kiss, nothing fancy, just a regular spin." San half snorts and half laughs against his neck and Puck smirks. "It's only fair that everyone gets a shot." And Finn's not piping up that his girlfriend shouldn't be making out with other girls. "San's sad, betcha a kiss'll cheer her up."
"It would," San lifts her head, smirking at Rachel, "I haven't gotten a Rachel kiss yet." Rach rolls her eyes, but still comes over to lean down to Santana and kiss her. San's hand reaches out to pull her closer, turning it into more than just a quick chaste kiss and Quinn laughs while she leans on Brittany before Rachel is released to pull away. "Thank you, Rachel."
"For-- For what?"
"For getting Quinn to go out with me and Britt." It's all Santana really manages before she nuzzles back into Puck, sighing slightly.
"She's just gone to sleep, hasn't she? Bitch," he's already losing feeling in his leg.
"You can just stay here for the night, Puck. I think we sort of owe you anyway." Britt offers to walk the others out, she offers to let them stay first, but there isn't that far from Britt's house to the Cohen-Chang house or the Hudson-Hummel house, so it looks like they're set.
"So, tonight didn't exactly go to plan." Quinn leans against the sofa, her head pillowed on her hand as her arm braces her on the sofa. "Sorry." He just shrugs slightly, remembering the rather vicious bite to his mouth that Kurt gave him. He was pretty sure that was the equivalent of a fuck you middle finger without anyone asking what it was all about. It was fairly obvious then, at least to Puck, that there was little to no point in the girls carrying on their little schemes.
"It's okay," he just sighs, because he was actually starting to wonder if maybe... "Kurt likes boring, that's up to him." Puck can take a hint when it makes him bleed. "At least you got things sorted?" Quinn smiles a little, nodding as she watches Santana asleep on Puck. "Gotta say, I might miss the random make-outs though."
"Don't worry," she nudges him slightly, just as Britt comes back in. "You're practically one of the girls." Even with the chaos of the last month, all stemming from Britt and her sex dice, he doesn't mind so much. He manages to fight off the dead leg long enough to get himself to his knees with San in his arms before he stands up, following Quinn and Britt upstairs to get San into bed.
He's a little surprised when Britt gets San to her underwear, Quinn shimmies out of her dress and they both end up tugging him out of his jeans and shit to haul him under the covers and snuggle in. So he can ignore the slight ache in his mouth and what it stands for, just wrap his arms around Quinn's waist and sink into the comfort of Britt's bed with the girls and work out how to get through the summer with Kurt quietly resenting him.
Tomorrow he can feel sorry for himself.
AN: Before I am murdered; yes, there is another part forth coming. However, this part really got away from me, so I decided to make it a three parter. There will be less het in the following part and more of what is really meant to be here. Puck and Kurt. So...yes, I shall be writing more of this.